Positive communication and a powerful mind…wonderful tools in People/Team management – Master it.

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Communication here can be simply described as an exchange of information or ideas with a purpose. Unlike other species on the planet, human beings are blessed with the ability to communicate with each other effectively. We can express very clearly when we are happy; though we do it very assuredly when we are not. We frequently communicate with ourselves too. Few examples are: when thinking how we need to get a resolution for a particular situation or the thoughts that go through when we need to take a decision, or make a choice. While preparing for an interview, counsel, motivate people. In fact the quality of communication in this process has a direct impact on our decisions and choices we make, both for us as well as others. Hence it is very important, that we keep this entire process simple, fair and a positive one.  

I would like to share an interesting excerpt from an anonymous speaker, which I stumbled on:

 The quality of our communication with the world outside determines our success. The quality of our communication with ourselves determines our happiness. It is not enough to just improve the quality of our communication, with the world outside. It is more important that we improve the quality of our communication with ourselves. It is not what happens to you, it is how you interpret what happens to you that make the difference.

It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.

-  J K Rowling

Communication - the human connection - is the key to personal and career success.

-  Paul J. Meyer

Once you improve the quality of communication devoid of any perception (for in depth understanding of how perception forms a barrier to positive communication, please refer to my earlier post: “Breaking our perception barrier to work with people effectively”) it is important that we express the thoughts to get results. Some subtle ways of expressing positive communication are:

·         Creating a receptive atmosphere.

·         Crystal clear communication with no room for ambiguity.

·         Smiling generously.

·         Not missing out an opportunity to appreciate.

·         Using appropriate body language/posture/appearance.

Also remember, our mind is a vault that stores all of our abilities, memories, learning and almost everything else. In other words, it is kind of a giant super space that is available to us. This resource is readily available to us at any given time. It is helpful to gather all the great experiences that we encounter, as a direct result of our positive communication. It is important that we develop our mind as a repository of these positive thoughts for future situations and opportunities. Hence the famous quote:

When MIND is weak, situation is a PROBLEM, When MIND is balanced, situation is a CHALLENGE, when MIND is strong situation becomes an OPPORTUNITY.

A strong mind filled with positive thoughts, is therefore essential while approaching impending challenges, which is perceived as a problem by many. Also, it forms a powerful tool with an ability to detect hidden opportunities while advancing such challenges. 

The art of gaining control over others…in People/Team management – Practicing it to perfection.

In an ever evolving complex world, challenges in life are getting more complicated day by day. Few of those challenges may be represented as getting a task done with a group of people. The tasks may vary; it could be working to exceed a set target or preparing the team for a competition ahead. It could be getting the team to work as one or even attempting to correct a behavior. Whatever, the impending task might be, achieving success, is difficult unless we have certain control over the people. Well there certainly are more than few ways and means, to gain control and accomplish. We can be task masters or try intimidation showing authority. We may emphasize the need and dictate terms to attain. This approach may even bring results every now and then. I am sure we have all come across similar situations and adopted these methods at some point or the other in the past. All these methods seem great till the time we are at the receiving end of it.

The charm of gaining control over others however, is the most effective when the other person willingly lets you to guide and gain control. Does it sound stupid? Or does it even seem possible? Why would anyone willingly let you control or guide them?

The answer to that is most likely the person in question believes your abilities to guide. The person entrusts you with the responsibility to do the best for him/her in that situation. Above everything else, the person simply trusts you.

Now this trust doesn’t happen just like that, you have worked so hard to establish it. In the past whatever you said or did was in the best interest and one which was inclined towards development of the person. You may also have helped the person through difficult situations. This strong bond is formed as this person for sure knows that you are a well wisher. Hence, it is even more important now that you ensure that bond remains strong always.  A famous quote that I wanted to share here:

“Trust is earned, respect is given, and loyalty is demonstrated. Betrayal of any one of those is to lose all three.”  - Ziad Abdelnour.

Few pointers that help you build such a strong bond are:

·         Taking genuine interest in the well-being of people.

·         Being a good listener and sensitive to their situations.

·         Offering help when they are in difficult situations.

·         Willing to work with them and support them through difficult times.

Well you now see having a way with people is not entirely that difficult, it just requires that we are interested in it. And it’s never too late to begin. We probably are on the path and already doing it, then let’s just practice it to perfection.

Lead yourself before leading others…in People/Team management – Self discipline a key contributor.

‘Dare to dream and care to achieve’ this line is famous with achievers and successful people and I have come across it many a time in the past. Each time I heard it, I felt motivated and explored the need for a big vision to attain bigger things in life. However, after a few futile attempts at it eventually lost focus and forgot about my recent vision. I used to back up my failure giving reasons like: I lacked the resources, the vision I set up was very ambitious, unattainable and so on. One thing common in all the attempts was certain; a lack of interest to pursue any further. I am sure most of you would have encountered situations like this. Little do we realize that by working on small tasks (that are attainable with little extra effort) instead of aiming for huge visions (that require a lot of practice, discipline and many other factors to be in sync), things may be very different. In fact these little steps over a period of time will become contributing factors for bigger things in life.

It is very similar to the phrases we often come across: A great journey starts with a single step or tiny drops of river form huge rivers. Hence it is essential that we take things slowly and work on them till we attain it. Setting up tasks and pursuing it with discipline is the key here. The tasks that you choose need not be limited just related to your work place and could be very simple steps such as:

·         Being punctual always.

·         Greeting and communicating with a smile.

·         Making eye contact in a conversation.

·         Spending quality time with your people.

·         Commitment to learn/read/share.

The commitment that you make here is a huge step towards your development. You may choose any such tasks that you feel will benefit you. But remember, once you identify a task work on it with an unfailing persistent level of discipline till it becomes a habit.

It is essential that we possess these attributes of self discipline that help lead ourselves even before we begin to lead others. Also self discipline is a winning idea that needs to be introduced and encouraged with people you work with. Soon they will realize the importance and the contribution of self discipline in their own personality development. Some of its many benefits that it offers are as follows:

·         Provides a path for a practical solution to an identified issue.

·         Helps focusing on a task and putting that extra effort to attain results.

·         Enhances will power and urges to be strong at situations.

·         Forms guidelines to practice patience and self control.

·         Chalks out a planned way of dealing with things that matter most.

This process of identifying the problem areas and your great attitude of working on them progressively will not go unnoticed. Needless to mention, it has huge impact on people working around you, in terms of things, they can learn from you. Self discipline evolved as a strong ability will not only help you gain respect from others, but also pave way for the bigger opportunities that lay in front of you.

The art of identifying the problem cycle in its budding stage...in people/team management. – Practice it.

While working with people, one thing for certain is that there will be problems cropping up every now and then, sooner or later; be it a new team or a seasoned one. There may be ways and means to deal with a problem and find a resolution at different stages. The challenge however is to identify in its nascent stage and take measures to avoid unnecessary escalation. It is a general practice with people to compare with their peers to ascertain their position in terms of performance, pay, way they are treated and other such things. When they begin this comparison, it very quickly develops into a strong feeling of dissatisfaction; should they discover any discrepancy. This is the very beginning of a problem. Let’s first understand the reasons that trigger a problem. Few of them are:

·         People feeling that they are not treated fairly either in terms of performance, pay or general treatment as compared to other members of the teams.

·         A feeling that a particular person is being targeted for some reason among the team.

·         General reasons of problems may even be gossip from various sources.

People are different and they react differently. Whatever the reasons might be once the idea is formed, it doesn't stop there. At this stage the person is ready to get it to your notice and hope to get a resolution. Few signs of this phase are:

·         A person who is usually talkative will choose to be silent, or vice versa.

·         Coming across with a lot of investigative questions to gather information.

·         Mingling with a new group and picking up their influence a lot.

·         Reluctant or hesitant body language.

·         Sudden rise in the number of questions on a specific topic.

These instances may initially seem simple or unimportant. However, we need to understand that this is the best instance to resolve a problem. Proactive approach in identifying and addressing the issue without any further delay will help a lot and nip the problem at the beginning stage. A casual chat with the concerned person, acknowledging when something has gone wrong and assurance of your support should do the trick.

If it is delayed or ignored; it quickly compounds into a strong feeling of grievance. Needless to mention, that they will collect strong evidence to defend their case. The person concerned now starts to vent out the feeling and attempts to express it evidently. This may vary depending on the nature of the problem and the level of frustration. This is the next level where people attempt to show clear signs of dissatisfaction. Few pointers to identify such behavior are:

·         Back answering at any and every occasion.

·         Constant disagreements and non cooperation.

·         Drop in performance and disinterest.

·         Deliberate falling behind to meet assigned targets.

·         Open defiance and insubordination.

·         Grouping up to revolt and voice their thoughts.

We need to realize that they indulge in such behavior to seek an opportunity to have a one to one meeting with you, to vent out their dissatisfaction and frustration. It is important that we understand that our aim is to resolve the issue; taking the matter personally at this juncture will only convert the already existing problem into a mess.

The people involved need a lot of reassurance even before they are willing to open up to you. Having a constructive one to one discussion is a sure shot way to begin. Always do your homework before going into such discussions. Not to confront or monopolize the discussion, but to have options open. Listening, understanding and empathizing are the only best methods in getting the other person work towards an effective resolution. My earlier posts, “You...the most important aspect of any conversation” and “You and I...Together we make a great team” explain further, tips for such difficult conversations. This way you ensure that the problem cycle ends with a solution and not with a disaster.

http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/the-art-of-identifying-the-problem-cycle-in-its-budding-stagein-peopleteam-management-practice-it-7193875.html

You are the most amazing person in the world...in people/team management. Rediscover yourself.

Yes that’s right; you are the most amazing person in the world. Have you ever felt that way? Did you ever realize it? Probably you haven’t thought about it, not just yet. I have had all kinds of days possible; merry, sad, pathetic and memorable ones. I am sure it’s the same with others too. How would you describe your day? If you have to explain and summarize your day, how would you go about and most importantly who would you do it with? I am assuming here that you would prefer to have that kind of conversation with a person or a friend who knows you the best. One who understands you thoroughly.  A person that knows how you would react to situations, how you behave when you confront challenges. One who would comfort you and support you in the difficult situations that you have been through; and also a trusted counsel who would advice when things could have been done differently. Basically, we are talking about a recap process of the entire day spent, with a trusted one. Some people discuss the events in the day or situations, with their spouse or a close friend. Others do it with themselves probably over a couple of drinks. Either ways it works great. The emphasis here is to recap and unwind preferably on a daily basis.

Now, if I go through the entire description of who, I am really comfortable having such a discussion with, one who understands me and is really flexible with my time. The person that best fits the sketch or occurs to my mind is me, myself. The reason, I probably am more comfortable with talking to myself are:

·         I can be true to myself without pride or prejudice.

·         I can relive the situation, which I am trying to recap without any sense of shame or guilt.

·         I can honestly judge and explore other possible outcomes of a particular situation, with a clear mind and my own capabilities.

There certainly are huge benefits of such a recap session of events in the day. A few reasons that it is recommended are:

·         What went good during the day and can it be inculcated as a habit.

·         Who facilitated us to excel and did we thank them enough.

·         What went wrong in a particular situation and what other choices did we have to avoid it in future.

·         Can the situation be corrected the following day with an amendment?

Similarly, when you pass on such attributes to your team, you teach them new ways to assess their actions and thereby learn to bring about a new beginning with greater possibilities, each day. They look upon you to learn amazing things. Please refer to my previous post for an in depth explanation: ‘One day I want to become like you’…in People/Team Management – Create that Impression.   

Whatever be the case a recap of the day that is just past is always very helpful. Doing it with your self is even better. It prepares you to better your next day as you know the possibilities first hand. Such simple things when made a habit will never fail to transform you to be a better person and a better leader. 

http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/you-are-the-most-amazing-person-in-the-worldin-peopleteam-management-rediscover-yourself-7187614.html

Today was a usual day until...in people/team management. – Re discover it.

Yes today was definitely a usual day for me with the daily chores and the normal worry that the receivables are down and the payable s are mounting up...mortgage is pending, you know the usual stuff. This routine is normal to me; I mean I am now used to that kind of pressure. I never budge or swerve from this kind of burden. I was having my own normal day and even enjoyed spending some time playing with my son (which I enjoy the most in life). I thought at least the evening would bring in some change and brighten up my otherwise boring day. I was hoping that something amusing would happen and put an end to my bothersome day. I was wrong; I got into an argument with an unreasonable customer who was arguing meaninglessly. I was trying to be polite and communicate; all in vain, he just kept on and on lecturing as to how we failed on delivering customer service and so on. This was it; I said to myself, this is the last disastrous thing that happens to me today. The conversation was thankfully, finally over; I got over it somehow.

I got a call from my friend who wanted to celebrate something and called me over, for a drink. At that moment, I thought god was still there for me, as I desperately needed to share an evening with a friend over some drinks. We met up at a normal joint, known for its good food and great drinks. Now, this is not a flamboyant place where staff where expected to be merry always; even if they were walking out of a funeral of their dear ones. We settled down and were placing our orders for food and drink. I noticed that the staff were so merry they were enjoying their time together; in spite of their day of hectic schedule.  They were all towards the end of their laborious day, yet they were so full of energy. They were calling out each other names and cheered us to do so placing our orders. They were having unlimited fun and were encouraging others to take part.

There were numerous things that occurred to me was how could this happen? How are they filled with so much of energy at the end of a monotonous day? Are they really happy? How are they happy at the fag end of the day? Not only that they are happy themselves, they are spreading it too. The crowd around were happily involved in their joyful conversations and in the process forgot their own miseries and sorrows. I confess, I was one among the crowd.

That is when I realized that happiness is contagious. It not only fills your own heart with joy, but also mirrors your reflection in other person’s life. For you, it might be just a way of life, but for some other person forms a purpose of life, so just to go ahead. And when you know this great secret of life...why not spread it. 

http://GoArticles.com/article/10079195/

Good Advice and Great Company...in people/team management. Practice it.

Good advice and Great Company are always hard to find, especially when you need them the most. Together, most of the times, they serve as a beacon to guide us out of a difficult situation. Many a times, we find ourselves in situations that we are aware of a right solution but we may not be clear or unsure of its outcome. In instances like these, good advice re assures and encourages us to take that step. This forms like a firm support for us during such tough times. It then provides us great relief. Hence it is recommended, that we are surrounded with great company that care for us always. The kind of company that we keep has its influence on our general behavior. At this point, we need to ask ourselves a question that; is the company that we keep keeping us back? Or is the influence of our company guiding us towards wrong direction? Few interesting quotes, which I thought would share here:

In giving advice seek to help, not to please, your friend.   – Solon

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't. ­-Erica Jong

“Do not be deceived: bad company corrupts good morals.”  - Holy Bible

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter.  - Izaak Walton

Needless to mention, our choice of company that we keep also reflects in the quality of decisions that we make; personally and professionally. Hence it is all the more important that we are always associated with a positive group of people, who certainly are our well wishers and can provide advice which aims to help us and not necessarily merely to please us. We need to realize that such a good company cannot be formed overnight and hence it is essential to build such a group over a period of time.

The process is simple, and is similar to choosing our best friends from a group of acquaintances from our past experiences.  We for sure know that our friends remain with us through thick and thin, guide us through adversities, people that we rely on. Even with our good friends, it did not happen overnight. This relationship too at some point of time, at the beginning of it was a new one. Eventually it grew into a strong bond with an investment of time. It took a lot of sharing and caring among each other to get to the stage, where it is now a tower of strength for us. However, we did not make those choices aiming to get some benefits out of it. We made that choice because we were happy with that person around or mostly because we liked it that way. 

Similarly, having such great company at the work place ensures to provide correct direction. Good advice from such people encourages you to take right decisions always. It also helps us enjoy our time at work. For bringing in the “Quality time” at work place, please refer to my earlier post: Changing What We Can at Our Work Place -Re Defining Work Environment.

Once you practice this and make it a habit, you will learn new things and evolve as a better person, as each of them comes with diverse expertise. When you learn, teach and share these best practices, you explore new horizons and discover new things.

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